Femdom Glossary: Terms and Meanings from A to Z

A

Aftercare

Time after a scene to rest, reconnect and check how everyone is feeling.

B

BDSM

An umbrella term for bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism.

Bondage

Restraining a partner, for example with rope or cuffs, by agreement. It needs proper safety knowledge.

C

Chastity

A practice where a keyholder controls her partner's orgasms, with or without a device. See our chastity guide.

Collar

In some dynamics, a symbol of a submissive's commitment. It may be worn privately or as jewellery.

Consent

Free, informed and ongoing agreement. It can be withdrawn at any time.

D

D/s

Short for dominance and submission.

Domme

A dominant woman. See what is a domme.

Dominant (dom)

The partner who takes the lead by agreement.

Dominatrix

A term for a dominant woman, often a professional.

Drop

A dip in mood or energy after intense play. Aftercare helps.

F

Femdom

Short for female domination. See what is femdom.

FLR

A female led relationship, in which the woman leads on agreed matters. See the FLR guide.

Financial domination

A power dynamic involving money. Be very careful: never send money or gift cards to someone you have not met.

H

Hard limit

Something a person will not do under any circumstances.

Humiliation play

Consensual teasing, verbal or role-based, agreed in advance and never meant to cause real harm.

I

Impact play

Striking with a hand or an implement, by agreement. It requires safety knowledge.

K

Keyholder

The person who holds the key to a chastity device and decides when it is removed.

Kink

A broad word for unconventional interests in sex and relationships.

L

Limits

The things a person will or will not do. See hard limit and soft limit.

M

Mistress

A title of respect for a dominant woman, used by her partner or by herself.

Munch

A relaxed social meeting for the kink community, with no play.

N

Negotiation

The conversation before a scene about wants, limits, safewords and aftercare.

P

Power exchange

The handing over and taking of authority by agreement.

Protocol

An agreed set of rules for behaviour, speech or conduct in a dynamic.

R

RACK

Risk-aware consensual kink: the idea that all play carries some risk, and both people should understand it.

Role-play

Acting out roles or scenarios by agreement.

S

Safeword

A word agreed beforehand that stops everything immediately.

Scene

A planned session of play, with a beginning and an end.

Sensory play

Using sensations such as texture, temperature or a blindfold, by agreement.

Soft limit

Something a person is unsure about, or will only do in certain conditions.

SSC

Safe, sane and consensual: the classic standard for kink.

Submissive (sub)

The partner who agrees to follow the dominant's lead.

Subspace

A deeply relaxed or altered mental state that some people describe during play.

Switch

Someone who enjoys both the dominant and the submissive role.

T

Topping from the bottom

Steering a scene from the submissive position while seeming to follow.

Training

A structured process in which a submissive learns agreed rules or skills.

V

Vanilla

Conventional, non-kink.

W

Worship

Acts of devotion or attention directed at a dominant, by agreement.

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24/7

A dynamic that continues all the time, not just during planned scenes.